Gaming

Thursdays are generally good days for me. I get to hang out with a bunch of cool guys and game. Yesterday was a little harrowing because Quicksilver was nic-fitting really badly and it made him flip out at things that normally wouldn't bother him. It distracted me from game and it was annoying to deal with, but I had to clamp down tight on the annoyance because there was no way in hell he could have dealt with it right then. But later that night I finally spoke up and expressed my annoyance and suddenly everything got a lot better. I think he's enough of an empath that the annoyance was getting through and it made things worse than if I'd simply expressed it sooner (except I didn't really have the opportunity, we hadn't been by ourselves until shortly before I expressed the annoyance).

Today I'm feeling oddly stressed out for no apparent reason. Maybe I'm just tired, I didn't get anything approximating enough sleep last night. Or maybe I've finally figured out what's been missing from my life for the past few years: people to be comfy with. People with whom I can be cuddly/snuggly without being afraid of hurting someone or sending the wrong message. I don't need lovers or fuck-buddies, I need comfy people (granted, I want lovers/fuck-buddies, but that's different). This leads me to the obvious question: how the hell do I find comfy people? And I honestly have no idea. I'll have to think about it.

Gaming

Thursdays are generally good days for me. I get to hang out with a bunch of cool guys and game. Yesterday was a little harrowing because Quicksilver was nic-fitting really badly and it made him flip out at things that normally wouldn't bother him. It distracted me from game and it was annoying to deal with, but I had to clamp down tight on the annoyance because there was no way in hell he could have dealt with it right then. But later that night I finally spoke up and expressed my annoyance and suddenly everything got a lot better. I think he's enough of an empath that the annoyance was getting through and it made things worse than if I'd simply expressed it sooner (except I didn't really have the opportunity, we hadn't been by ourselves until shortly before I expressed the annoyance).

Today I'm feeling oddly stressed out for no apparent reason. Maybe I'm just tired, I didn't get anything approximating enough sleep last night. Or maybe I've finally figured out what's been missing from my life for the past few years: people to be comfy with. People with whom I can be cuddly/snuggly without being afraid of hurting someone or sending the wrong message. I don't need lovers or fuck-buddies, I need comfy people (granted, I want lovers/fuck-buddies, but that's different). This leads me to the obvious question: how the hell do I find comfy people? And I honestly have no idea. I'll have to think about it.

Clan

I'm beginning to realize that one of my boxes that I place people in is "Clan" or "Not Clan". I use the term Clan in reference to Digiclan, a group of friends I had in late high school that formed at the Center for Talented Youth, but I don't specifically mean geeks. I've been trying to figure out how to explain Clanness, so here's a first stab at it.

There are people who, as kids, find that they do not possess a certain ability that many people seem to have: the ability to act a certain way with some people and a different way with other people. Generally these people have difficulty playing the popularity game (they are almost universally unpopular in grade school, with the possible exception of high school or certain private schools) and end up with few to no friends during this period. Many of them spend more time with books, comics, or computers than with human beings. Many of them end up not following traditional social conventions because they do not understand the reasoning behind them (e.g. it makes it easier to get along with other people).

This is what I've managed to think up thus far. I would like to point out that people who are "not Clan" are not worse or better than people who are "Clan". I just tend to be more comfy around "Clan" people, because I tend to understand them better and vice versa.

Clan

I'm beginning to realize that one of my boxes that I place people in is "Clan" or "Not Clan". I use the term Clan in reference to Digiclan, a group of friends I had in late high school that formed at the Center for Talented Youth, but I don't specifically mean geeks. I've been trying to figure out how to explain Clanness, so here's a first stab at it.

There are people who, as kids, find that they do not possess a certain ability that many people seem to have: the ability to act a certain way with some people and a different way with other people. Generally these people have difficulty playing the popularity game (they are almost universally unpopular in grade school, with the possible exception of high school or certain private schools) and end up with few to no friends during this period. Many of them spend more time with books, comics, or computers than with human beings. Many of them end up not following traditional social conventions because they do not understand the reasoning behind them (e.g. it makes it easier to get along with other people).

This is what I've managed to think up thus far. I would like to point out that people who are "not Clan" are not worse or better than people who are "Clan". I just tend to be more comfy around "Clan" people, because I tend to understand them better and vice versa.