It sounds like you're saying the answer to the problem of people needing to hide in closets is to build closets for all, to make closets the new normal. I'd rather tear the closets down and have loving consensual relationships be celebrated in all their forms - let same-sex couples get married in churches and community centers that welcome them with open arms, let the polyamorous be open with their love as we work out the legal conundrums of such extended relationships. We know that people who know LGBT folks become more accepting of LGBT lifestyles - people fear what they do not know. Extending the closets will only increase the fear, giving more power to the Jerry Falwells of the world.
So I can not condone the depublicization of intimate relationships. The opposite makes us more real to each other - not the saccharine tales of Hollywood but the real life ins and outs of trying to get along with our fellows, of loving and failing and trying again. It's only through seeing and knowing our mutual humanity that we can come to understand and truly love each other. That is the only way for the strange to truly be safe - by being seen as real human beings along with everyone else.
(I know there are some very foundational ideas and themes that we just plain do not agree on, and this is a subject I am very passionate about. So I am glad that you do see this as debate of ideas rather than discussion of personal qualities - I can see at least in part why you hold your views, even while I deeply disagree with them ;)
Re: Forcing a public celebration of such a deeply personal thing
Date: 2010-02-15 12:25 am (UTC)So I can not condone the depublicization of intimate relationships. The opposite makes us more real to each other - not the saccharine tales of Hollywood but the real life ins and outs of trying to get along with our fellows, of loving and failing and trying again. It's only through seeing and knowing our mutual humanity that we can come to understand and truly love each other. That is the only way for the strange to truly be safe - by being seen as real human beings along with everyone else.
(I know there are some very foundational ideas and themes that we just plain do not agree on, and this is a subject I am very passionate about. So I am glad that you do see this as debate of ideas rather than discussion of personal qualities - I can see at least in part why you hold your views, even while I deeply disagree with them ;)